Thursday, August 1, 2013

The Little things!

Oh the things you enjoy when you have everything taken away. I long for the day when I can go to the toilet without thinking about it, and taking a vomit bucket with me. Without thinking, "Have I fully emptied my bladder?", " Am I going to poop or vomit?, or both?" which happens often. I long for the day when I eat properly, without having to take a tablet to stop me feeling sick. I long for the day when I have the physical strength to prepare my family a meal, to drive the car, to go shopping, to leave the house without assistance and to go somewhere other than the hospital. We have this nice new van (new to us) that we all long to go for a drive in. I long to be able to care for my baby properly, and for my family. For days when I can cook the meals that make my family feel better, bring healing to my husband, and wellness to my children. I don't want these first days with my baby to go by without me begin able to be a part of them. There is no more babies for us, which is really hard to think, I'm missing all these things, the breastfeeding, the special times, and so on, and I've never going to get them again. I'm blessed to be here with my family and seeing them grow, learn, and change. However there are hard things about that as well.