Guest Post - Kerry Jensen

Staying positive in the face of the negative

This is a guest post by Kerry Jensen who over the last several years had to face many challenges. I asked her, "How have you kept a positive attitude with all the chaos that is going on.  Here is her story. 

Kerry Jensen

I guess you could say, that life for me over the last 3 years has not been an easy road to travel. In 2012 my husband and I were expecting our third baby, our third precious Son.

At 20 weeks gestation, they discovered my blood pressure was sky high, and then began a road of medications, weekly checkups and scans. We went for an ultrasound scan one day, only to be sent straight to our doctor at the hospital, he shut the door and sat us both down.

He looked at me and said "your baby is in danger". 

My blood pressure was still sky high, I had pre-eclampsia, and to add to it, there wasn't enough fluid surrounding our baby. We were admitted to hospital that afternoon, and sent down to Hobart- 4 hours away from home, to a bigger hospital that could handle premature born babies. At 28 weeks, after a terrifying rush into theatre for an emergency c-section, and a very quick goodbye to my terrified husband, I had my third Son. 

He weighed a very tiny 617 grams. 

Ethan 

His skin was transparent. He looked like a skinned rabbit, and we could hold Him in one hand. He was surrounded by tubes, cords and monitors, and spent the first 4 months of His life in the hospital.

His First Hat

After getting out of the hospital our lives were filled with the care of our three boys, and constant trips to the doctors and hospital to make sure Ethan was ok. Then in 2013, I spent five long weeks in hospital, on oxygen support. 

The doctors assumed I had pneumonia, but after the 11th try of antibiotics weren't improving my lungs, they suspected an auto immune disease. After a muscle biopsy, and daily test's, it was confirmed, my immune system was trying to shut down my lungs, and muscles.

I've learnt to walk again, been through almost a year of physio, chemo and intense steroids. 

Well, how do I look at the positives in all of this? 

They say, whatever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.  I've walked a lot of this journey, kicking and screaming for the ride to stop. I've begged for answers, and prayed until I had nothing left.

I wanted to run away, but couldn't. I was broken.

So where did I put my trust? 

In the only one who was big enough to deal with these health issues, and strong enough to hold my pain. God. I found it easier to dump it all at His feet, I met Him face to face. He accepted me as I was, a broken wreck, needing a miracle. Life didn't get easier, but my faith became stronger!

I learnt to see the small positives in every day,

I became thankful instead of fearful. I stopped seeing myself as a broken wreck, and saw what God saw... the potential, and the worth. I started eating well- healthy foods made a huge difference. I stopped needing to have everything under control, organised and clean.

We stopped with the sterile environment and swapped it with FUN. I became creative, and the joy came back. Life is only what we make of it.

Choose to see the positives!.

If you have enjoyed reading Kerry's Guest Post, the leave her a comment, and you might like to follow her continuing journey to healing on Facebook. Here

Zest for Life

Children have an AMAZING Zest for Life.

I have always found it amazing the Zest for life that children have. Having seven that are all at slightly different stages of growth and development, there is always something going on in our house.

 Most days I hear at least one child say,"watch me!", "See what I can do now!". They are excited about learning, excited by pushing there bodies to find out what they can do with them. Exploring the environment around them, seeing what they can make with the things they find. There is joy that exudes them. 

So what happens then when we become adults?

For many of us the thought of running a marathon sounds like a lot of work. Doing the dishes is work, hanging out washing is work. However for children, they think it is fun! They love playing Mummy and Daddy, pretending to do the things that we see as work. We get busying the act of living that we forget to enjoy life. We only get one shot at this so we should allow ourselves to time to breath deeply the aroma's of life, and cherish the moments we have. 

As a home educating Mum, I want to try my best to keep this natural love of learning alive. Help my children continue in that passion of discovery of how things work, why things are so, how far their bodies can go, how fast they can run....etc the list is endless, and hopefully in the process, I will also get somewhat back to that place of simple joy, and exploration.

There are many lessons that we can learn from Children and that is part of the JOY in being around them. 

What is your favourite lesson that you have learnt from your children? Leave me a comment. 

Family Meal Table

The Family Dinner Table is Important.

 

We have always wanted to create and have a close knit family. One of the many ways to help create that in our fast pace lives is to treasure the family dinner table.

It is a time not only for the family eat, but for a family to commune together. Occasionally and not as much as I would like to us too, we make an event of it.  It is great to see how much the children love it.

Dressing Up the Table

We dress up the table, light candles, sing, pray and have conversations.  We have done many things over the years. I have made my own conversation box, and pray box.

In the conversation box are cards all of which contain a question to help start off a conversation, and in the pray box are cards with the names and sometimes photos of people that we would like to pray for regularly.  The children will take in turns on different nights drawing out from each of the boxes.

Get Everyone Talking and Connecting

Other nights we play the game, tell us something you love about the person sitting next to you, or across from you. We do this one on days when the children have been particularly argumentative with each other, and need to be reminded that they do actually really love each other, and are loved by the other member of there families.

It is amazing how much the children enjoy this time as a family.

What things do you and your family do at the dinner table? Leave me a comment. 

The Willis Clan Family on TODAY Show - full video

My Husband and I have always said that we would like to have a family band.  I look forward to the day. But now I'm enjoying seeing the Will's Clan :) I hope you enjoy it too.

Pocket money.

Last fortnight I posted our new point system at home to help with rewards and behavioural management. We are also using it as a way to help the children to learn to manage there money.  So each point equals 5 cents.

To help our children develop good money habits, we are starting with the idea of using 10% for Charity, 10% for savings, and then they can choose what to use the remainder for with in reason.

With the remainder I hope to encourage them to start setting up there businesses, but for now we are focusing on the saving and giving elements.

So this was our first week of them giving from their own money. They had $5.40 to give. I asked my facebook friends for some advice on charities that they could give the money too.

Here is the working list of charities and ideas that they can give too.

Of course the first meaningful one on our list is the
Hope for Accreta Foundation.  Others on the list are;
Samaritans Purse Operation Christmas Child.
Australian Red Cross
Baby Mum Australia
Tear Australia and "useful gifts"
Heartfelt
SIDS
Starlight
Ronald McDonald House
SIM - Serving in Mission 
Guardian Care
Cycstic Fibrosis
Gospel for Asia 
Chilout
Oxfam
Kiva.org
The Good Shepherd Agricultural Mission
Compassion Australia
Epilepsy Australia
Heart Kids
Cancer council

So that is a good start. They give there money this fortnight to buy a chicken via Tear Australia "Useful gifts", and look forward to researching and learning more about the other organisations and what things they do to help the communities they are working for. Maybe one day they will start their own, or run some fundraising events for charities that they find are close to their hearts.

Do you have your children give to charity? What works for you? And who do you give to?

Our Latest News....

For those of you that have been reading my blog recently you will know that some of the reason I have been doing the GAPS Diet with my husband is to heal my body in the hope that I will be able to have healthy pregnancies in the Future. I have had 2 c-sections, and hope to be able to have Vba2c, I have also had gestational diabetes with all my pregnancies. So the hope was that I would be about bring my body back into order, loss the extra weight, and go on to have a healthy pregnancy. I've currently lost 23kgs, an feeling pretty good, but I do still have a long way to go on the weight front.

We we recently found out that we are 5 weeks pregnant. I have started monitoring my blood sugars just to check what they are doing. So far my after eating blood sugars are perfect. However my fasting blood sugars while still in the normal range are on the higher side than the lower side, which doesn't give me much breathing room as the pregnancy progresses. So what does this mean. Well it means that my liver is still releasing glucose stores, when I'm not eating. So I'm aiming to try and do something about this while I still can. My goal at the moment will be to have kefir smoothing, morning and night, as Kefir has shown over and over again to normalise blood sugar and keep it on an even level, for both high and low blood sugars. I am also going to start walk after my evening meal. I'm hoping this is something the children and I can do together, they are doing little athletics and want to get better and I want to get fitter as well for this pregnancy, so we are planning on training together.

I'm a christian that believes that God speaks to us to day, and one thing that I have been hearing from him over and over, the last weeks is "Huff and Puff". So that is what I plan to do, starting today. I hope to use this blog as a bit of an accountability journal for this as well as for our GAPS Journey. I have no plans of leaving the GAPS Diet I believe it can give me the best chance of having a healing pregnancy.

So I'll keep you updated on how I go.
Thanks
Christina

Children and GAPS

I have been ask to write about children and GAPS. I can't say that I am the best person to do this. Our children are eating full GAPS 6 days out 7, with the exception of one day a week when we visit my mum and she cooks for them. Also I haven't made our children do intro. However in saying that they have done intro with fruit and carrots. We have always been a household were the children weren't allowed to be fussy. I normally keep fruit on hand, if they don't like what I am making and don't eat it, I won't make them something else, and I ask them to at least try what is on their plate. Dessert is a privilege and one that must be earnt by eating your dinner. If you can't eat your dinner you can't eat dessert. In saying that as well we don't often have dessert.

So I don't have a lot of experience with picky eater, as I'm sure some of your out there will have, please share your experience and tips in the comments.

Anyhow here are some of the things that I do with my family
- Get the children involved in the cooking process.
- Talk with the children about why we eat these foods.
- Have lots of food for children eat or snack on.
- Grow what you can.
- Try not to make a big deal out of eating.
- Have fun experimenting with a different way to cook.

Getting Children Involved
Starting a journey like GAPS for some means a heap more time in the kitchen, cooking things that they aren't use to, or not had to cook in the past. It can be very overwhelming at times. My advice, if you have children that can help, use them! Clearly some of you won't be able to do this, your child/ren are too ill, or too young. As my older children (6,7,8) love Breakfast balls in the morning I have taught then, if they want them for breakfast, they need to get the meat out of the freezer the night before. They are also capable of smooshing the meat, herbs, salt, pepper, and egg together and rolling them into balls ready for me to cook. Of course, I supervise, while doing another kitchen job. Two of my younger children (3 and 5)can get the carrots and veggies ready for our morning juice/milkshake.

I am also in the process of teaching my older children to care for the milk kefir. They love Kefir icey poles, so for them it means that they also get to make some icey poles. As they and I get used to this routine, I will get them involved in more an more.

Talk with the children about why we eat these foods
When we first started this diet I think that hardest concept for my children to get their heads around was why not these foods. After all we have spent the last several years teaching them that fruit was healthy and good for you, and now all of a sudden we weren't eating it. It took I think the first month to explain to them that fruit was still healthy, it's just that our bodies were not, so our bodies couldn't get the goodness out of food. We had to let our bodies heal so that we could eat those things again.

Also my children really love it when I can explain to them what part of their bodies each food is helping. Ie Walnuts are good for the brain, Carrot's are good for the eyes, and so on. I often find them telling me "Look Mummy I'm feeding my heart" while eating a tomato. :0)

Have lots of food for children to eat or snack on
GAPS food is easy to digest so the body doesn't have to do a lot of work to absorb it. So many people, children included feel hunger a lot when they start GAPS, especially if you start with intro. So having extra cooked veggies, boiled meats, boiled eggs(when you get that far) in the fridge is really handy. You really don't want to be a position with children saying they are hungry, when everything you can feed them takes an hour plus to make.

Grow what you can
This point has a double purpose. One it can help with the ever growing food bill, and two, much research has been done into getting children to eat veggies, and growing it themselves, along with cooking it, is seeing many parents and school succeed in this area. Even if you only start with one product, like tomatoes. The is no tomato like a home grown one, Once you eat your own you won't want to turn back. As you go along give your children a veggie that is theirs to grow, put them in charge of it. You will be teaching them a valuable life skill, and giving them something to be proud off. When we eat food that our children have grown we say a special thank you to them at the dining table. I love seeing their faces light up when we say how much we like that particular veggie.

Try not to make a big deal out of food
While we have the rule that if you don't like what your given then tough!, we try not to make a big deal out of it. The children know the rules, they don't need us repeating it over and over. If they are hungry they can have some fruit or a carrot, but there will be nothing else until the next meal time. However in saying that we do make them try what is on their plate before they leave the table, and there have been times when I know they haven't even tried the food and are just being stubborn, in which case I have made them sit at the table until it is eaten. Which in most cases has them sitting there for a good amount of time, refusing to eat it. Then they finally give up and eat it in a few short minutes. When these situations arise, and we make a stand, we don't back down. However I don't sit there talking to them about it, putting pressure on them, I simply carry on with what I am doing, until they relent. I don't think it is necessary to do this at every meal, with every child. You know your child and you know all the other factors around that moment. Be wise, pick your battles.

Have fun experimenting with different ways of cooking
For many moving onto the GAPS Diet, going through the stages will having you cooking things you may never tried before, or cooking in ways that you have never done before. Or in most cases cooking with out things you are used to using. Have fun with this process, if you have fun, they will have fun, and the whole experience will be much more enjoyable for everyone. There are some amazing foods that you enjoy on GAPS, you just need to be open to them, and open to the creative process.


Like I said before our children are not 100% full GAPS, however we have seen positive changes in their bodies, and minds. They have also learnt that eating junk makes them feel unwell, gives them eczema, for Elijah it induces vomiting at times. For others it can cause bed wetting, headaches, generally unwell. Which I see as a valuable lesson.

I hope this has helped you some. For more ideas, recipes, and testimonies, I will put some links below for you to check out.
Christina


http://www.mamaeve.com/caring-for-baby-a-toddler/best-baby-food/gaps-diet-getting-a-picky-eater-to-eat/

http://www.cheeseslave.com/autism-recovery-with-the-gaps-diet-one-mothers-story/

http://www.nourishmd.com/home/1604-doing-the-gaps-diet-at-disney-world

http://www.healthhomehappy.com/

Joy of the Home - Not Just a Mother

My blog title "The Joy of the Home" may give readers the impression that I am always joyful at home. I'm very sorry to say that I am not. I have grown up in a world that has given girls so many double messages. One being that women have rights and freedom to choose their path in life.... as long as that path includes working. For as long as I can remember growing up people asked the same question over and over, "What do yo want to be when you grow up/leave school?". I don't know that my answer was ever a wife and mother. I knew that I wanted to be married and have children at some point, but I never really saw that as an occupation.

During my last year of high school I remember one time when our home room teacher actually asked us this question, wanting us to share with the class, our hopes and goals for the future after we left. There was lots of different answers, someone want to be a vet, another a farmer, a teacher, a doctor, and so on. All was going well until one of my classmates answered that she wanted to be a MOTHER! "A MOTHER!" Well our female teacher was most unimpressed with that answer. She belittled the female student, saying that was not a real goal and she could be so much more than that. At the time I don't think that I thought too much about it, but it really was a message that speaks of our social belief, that women shouldn't settle for being "just" a mother.

So my jounery began to make a career for myself. I studied my Bachelor in Perfroming Art and then went on to the next step of studying teaching... During that time I met my husband to be, we married, and our first child was conceieved three month after that. I had known I wanted to be a mother, but I had this impression that once she was born I would put her in care a few hours a day while I continued study.... But when she arrived the thought of putting her in care was out of my mind... there was no way I could do that.

It was then that my thought processes began and I started questioning, why do I have to be more than a mother? What is wrong with me "just" being a wife and mother?. Interestly enough anyone that is a wife and mother knows that there really is no "Just". When your a mother you actually take on so many roles, comforter, teacher, cook, cleaner, nurse, taxi, and much much more! To actually give this new role justice it takes a lot of time and energy. The role is extremely difficult, but amazingly rewarding. However there was still this darkness hanging over my head when people would ask me what I did. It didn't take me long to realise that it was my mind set that needed changing, I wasn't going to be able to change society but I could change me.

Since that time I have been on a journey to find the Joy in being at home. I am not always the best at it and I clearly have my struggles, but it is a journey. I had and am having to retrain myself. I have spent all this time in school "Learning" but never really being taught how to run a home, how to tend a garden to feed my family, how to cook nutritious meals that will benefit my family three times a day, how to disciple myself to put several loads of washing on the line, bring it in, and fold it. As well as read to my children lots, and play with them, listen to what they care about , and the list goes on and on.

So this blog in part is about that journey for me. Learning to find the joy in doing the mundane tasks over and over, and what I like to call "sucking the joy out of everything" experience every last drop and savoring it. Experience this role as much as I can, while I can.

I hope you too are on the same journey of learning to suck the joy out of every moment you get. You never know when it will end.

The Little things.

My how the little things can change the day or how you feel about it. Today was a busy day cleaning up after our adventures with the vomit bucket. While my husband did a great job of looking after everyone, he didn't manage to catch all the vomit. So with 5 people in the house vomiting you can imagine we had lots of washing of sick towels, bedding, vomit buckets, to do. So on the scale of things I like doing with my day, this is going to be full of things that are not my favorites.

Needless to say my emotions were a bit on the gloomy side. However after a short stint in the garden, a quick water, and look, I felt so optimistic again. Seeing the new life, new fruit growing that is going to soon be feeding my family and keeping us busy, preserving and processing, more work, but enjoyable work. I felt hope that is too will so pass. The washing will get finished, as long as we keep washing.

More Children!

Yes more children! I would love to have more children! I get asked a lot if we are done yet or will we keep going? My simple answer is Yes! My long answer is I'm loving this sooooo much, why would I want to stop. When I cuddle my baby, kiss him, feed him, spend time with him, I am so in love. Plus the more I have the better I'm getting at it. As I go along I learn more about myself and about loving, caring and bonding with my babies. The joy that they bring into my life is astounding! Yes there are times when you are sleep deprived and weary, we all have those hours, days, weeks, sometimes months, but the joy and delight they bring is so worth any of that.

There are longer answers to this question. However my simple answer is, why would I want to give this up, I'm just getting good at it. :)

One sick, all Sick

One of the more challenging things about having a bigger than normal family is when you are sick. If one get something, everyone gets it mostly. This weekend has been one of those weekends for us. We had Christmas early due to some of the family being in the country. So we had Christmas lunch at my husbands Grandmothers house, which is about an hours drive from our house. On the way home one of our daughters vomited. Now this was the same night as the carols by candle light that we like to attend. So we pulled Ervy the van over, and cleaned up some of the mess. Thinking that her vomiting may have been caused by the long drive home after eating too much food we decided to take her home and put her in the bath a long with her little brother who was asleep in the back. The other children were really excited about going to Carols so talked me into taking them along on my own. So we went, put our rug down near some friends and enjoyed sing and waving our candles. As the night progressed Elijah announced to me that he wasn't feeling very well. We had had a long full day and Carols where nearing the end, so I suggested that he lay down on the rug. He was happy to do that for a while. However his friends were there and enjoying the fun of dancing over near the corner of the stage. So he joined in.... Well then it began.... He started vomiting.... right there in front of everyone.... Oh gosh the embarrassment....But slightly funny at the same time. Another child had come up to him amd stood there watching him vomit..."Your vomiting!" Really? The minds of children can be so funny at times, vocalising the obvious.

So that was the end of Carols, I packed the rest of the children up and took them home. While it was the end of the carols it was not the end of the vomiting! I phoned my husband on the way home and told him to get the bath running for Elijah to get in, and explained the situation. Mean while he is wetting himself on the other end of the phone about it all. Not so sure he would have been laugh if the situation was reversed. So after getting home and cleaning everyone up, we prepared for the long night.

My Marvellous husband was the king of catching vomits. That night we have 5 of our 6 children vomiting, and I was as well. At one point Isaac and I were sharing a vomit bucket. And trying to get a 2 year old to vomit into a bucket is a feat in itself. He would start crying then do a small vomit, while you were cleaning that one up, he would walk off and start vomiting somewhere else.

If we didn't laugh we would have cried!

Thankfully the worst of it is over with, and now we are on recovery and clean up. I think we have a few clean towels in the house. But tomorrow hopefully we are feeling up to a good clean out.

Teachable Opportunities!

Look for teachable opportunities, you never know how you may help someone else

I remember a time when I only had two children, and was having a play date at the park with a close friend, while we where chatting one of her friends came to say hi, and mentioned she was pregnant. So I asks a few questions to be included in the conversation, like, when are you due?, how are you feeling?, and are you going to find out the sex?. the other questions where fine, but the last one changed the conversation. She said "oh no we don't do ultra sounds!" I was really surprised as at that point I had never met anyone who had a problem with U/S. But instead of seeing this an opportunity to share with me about why they choose not to, she went on whole different manner of "I'm a better Mother than you, because of the choices I make".

Only now after having 5 children, with number 6 on the way, have I really developed my beliefs about birth and pregnancy and can stand on them. However I do wonder how much soon that journey would/could have progressed had that Lady seen it as a teachable opportunity.

Children Zest for Life!



I have been thinking recently and over the years, how amazing children are! Having five, we have several different stages of development in our house. One thing that I love about watching children grow, is their amazing love for life. Most days I hear at least one child say,"watch me!", "See what I can do now!". They are excited about learning, excited by pushing there bodies to find out what they can do with them. Always trying out new things.

So what happens then when we become adults?

For many of us the thought of running a marathon sounds like a lot of work. Doing the dishes is work, hanging out washing is work. But for children, they think it is fun! They love playing Mummy and Daddy, pretending to do the things that we see as work.

For me as a home educating Mum, I wait to try my best to keep this natural love of learning alive. Help my children continue in that passion of discovery of how things work, why things are so, how far their bodies can go, how fast they can run....etc the list is endless, and hopefully in the process, I will also get somewhat back to that place of simple joy, and exploration.

Table of Prayer!

"The family that Prays together, Stays together"

We have always wanted to have a close family, and have tried a few things in the past, but have let things go, mainly because the children where a bit too little to participate.

My how children surprise you!

The other night we where all sitting around the dinner table, when the children were being really loud and not settling, out of the blue I had the idea to get them to pray. So I asked them all to think of someone that they would like to pray for. We all (include My husband and I) took turns praying for our friends and family members. It was great! Our children always have enjoyed praying, we pray for the before they sleep, and now they are a bit bigger they like to pray at bed time for people as well. But this was the first time we had done it all as a family at the dinner table.

Praise God for my Children
...and there persistent spirit!

The next night we sat down to eat, totally forgetting about the impromptu prayer meeting the night before, to have dinner. Then Sophie ran to get the children's bible which we read to them most nights at the table, after there daily reading, they then asked if we could pray?, I was totally shocked at how excited they where to do this again. So we did! Then the next night Daddy was not feeling so well, so each of the children Prayed for Him to feel better, and then another need arose so we prayed.

Now we Pray together most nights! How amazing...they are so open to God, and have this simple faith. There is no "if" God exists for them, they just know he does! And they are eager to learn more about Him, who created them for a purpose!

Hallelujah, Glory be to God!

Exemption

I wanted to add to my previous blog about family Size. Often when I talk about it or it is discussed by someone, there are some people that feel like those that choose this method are judging those that don't. Will I guess for some people they are... But for me that's not it! For me I believe that it is a decision that every husband and wife needs to make together. What is God asking them to do... I don't want people to feel judge or condemned for what we do in our lives, we each have to do what we believe to be right. For me that mean doing what is right in the Lord's eyes as well as our own. If your decision is to have two children and stop. Then stand in that decision. Take from my blog what is useful to you and leave what is not. I am not a completed work, by that I mean, I am like you, and far from perfect, we all have our good and bad, and hopefully each day is a step forward more good less bad, but we all stubble too and need to start at the start again. Bless you!

Letting God plan our Family Size

For me, making the decision to allow God to plan our family size was a big decision and not one entered into lightly. Much Thought and Prayer went into the decision, But for me the bottom line was that we knew it was what the Lord was asking of us! So we had to say yes! When we first entered into this decision we had one baby and another or the way, and not a lot of Money. When asked the question as a girl how many children I wanted to have my answer was probably pretty standard "a boy and a girl". We never set out to have a lot of children but as the Lord warmed our heart to letting Him decide, after all He know far more than us, and knows what is to come in the future,the idea of having a lot doesn't worry me now. I was challenged by the thought that I could possible have 20 children, I mean I'm not a rocket scientist but I can count, and do simple maths. The next step for me was then changing my attitude to that possible 20 children, I mean really why was the thought of having that many children a problem? Of course there are lots of challenges facing large families but the same can be true of small families... Was Have a large family the problem or was it my thinking... after searching the scriptures and my heart I knew the answer was my thinking... and then set forth to make a covenant with my future children, I didn't want any of my children to come into this world without me being joyful of there arrival. After all the world is a cruel enough place as it is, they needed me on there side. That then being said the issue wasn't any more about how many children I might have, but learning to be the best mother I can be to any number of children that I might have, and the Lord may bring into our lives. Learning skills to manage my household, feed my family, nourish there bodies, minds, spirits and souls. This is where I am today...Learning, learning, Learning. Some days I get it right other far from it but each day is a journey of learning.